Christmas Party, School Play, and A new dish

I know that the rat problem has been at the top of your list of concerns over the past week and we appreciate your thoughts. I am happy to announce that the rodent in question last week was disposed of in the typical fashion. Yes, we did what every household that has had to deal with a rat problem would do; throw it out on the yard and watch the symbol of our nation come swooping down and carry it off to wherever it is that Bald Eagles eat rats. Since then the trap has been empty, the cats have been at ease, and Cassidy and I can try to kick this caffeine addiction we have developed by staying up listening to every sound we hear with absolute terror.
In our newly relaxed state, we did manage to make it to the town Christmas party. It was a Christmas party in the sense that people were there and it was certainly around Christmas, but it seemed more like one of those seminar meals you get roped into in an attempt to buy a time share. Basically 100 people sitting in silence eating the side dish that they themselves brought in a not so subtle attempt to avoid the potluck walk of shame. Santa showed up and gave out gifts to the children. It is actually a great program that the VFW of Alaska does by sending out three gifts for every child on the island. Isabel could not believe it when her name was called to go and see Santa on the sled. She got a Barbie and the requisite barbie clothes (God knows she can't be seen wearing the same outfit twice. Especially now with all the crap those Bratz Dolls have been talking lately), and the Aristocrats DVD (because after seeing it 178 times through Netflix, you just have to own it!). She was adorable and I am certain pictures will be posted. In addition to her Santa gifts, my students have taken a liking to Isabel and have given her several gifts. These gifts range from a Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz to a slightly used (and slightly stained) extremely large purple pegasus that comes with its very own distinctive smell of Pall Mall 100's. Take a wild guess at which of these gifts she won't let go of.
So tonight was the all too entertaining school play. Although it concludes what amounts to tens of hours of my time, it is just the beginning of years of therapy and what I am sure will resemble a grand mal seizure every time I hear the words "children" and "play" anywhere in the same sentence. It is going to make going to the park with Isabel an absolute hell. To put it in perspective, imagine giving twenty children costumes, props, and music. Now try to get them to calm down. The ten "older" kids lack any sign of motivation or enthusiasm. The ten younger children, however,......the only way I can describe these children is with a question (if that makes any sense at all); have you ever seen the movie Gremlins? OK! NOT the cute ones!!! The ones that were fed after midnight (or whatever weird rules they had)!!
Cassidy has done her best to get me through this trying time. She is always the supportive one. Even when I want to try stupis stuff. Yesterday, for example, I wanted to go Ptarmigan hunting. For those of you that don't know, Ptarmigan is a bird very much like a grouse or pheasant. Only dumber. After going out with my friend Ti yesterday, I came home with five of these birds. If I could stop my story here just for a little friendly advice....Whenever you move to a new location and try to experience things that have been foreign to you, ASK THE LOCALS!!! I say this because Ti said I should wait to breast out the birds and he would show me "later". I waited long enough to go in the kitchen and grab a knife. I removed each breast of meat with the precision of a surgeon. It was beautiful. It also took me an hour (keep in mind these birds weigh about a pound). When I was on the last one, our neighbor Rhonda and her friend Elaine came over to the garage. I was all smiles and proud as could be with my plate of eight clean breasts of meat that sat on the table. She said with all sincerity, "want me to show you how to do that?" In about, oh, Id say four seconds she had just ripped the entire chest out of the bird. Little known fact; it is a lot easier WITHOUT the feathers. I stood there as humble as could be and explained that I just wasted the better part of an hour pretending I was doing some sort of poultry transplant. They giggled a little and my wife laughed a lot (she always seems to show up at the right time to do that).
Cassidy took some of the meat and used a simple pan-fry recipe. There was nothing simple about the taste, though. DELICIOUS! Cassidy breaded them up or something and had some sort of sauce (I should be a food critic, right?) that tasted so good! I think I will be hunting those little fellers again!
So, just to recap:
1)Our fear of rats has been replaced by a fear that our daughter will get emphasema by way of second hand stuffed pegasus smoke.
2)When given the choice between ritual suicide and organizing a school play, take a lot of time to decide if you have done enough good in your life to be completely satisfied.
3)It seems that no matter what animal is brought into the house (save for the rat), Cassidy can find a way to make an unbelievable meal out of it!
Merry Christmas, Everyone! Thanks for reading!